Ladies and Fellas, I was hella bored,
so I pedaled hella' hard,
to a seminar in Zansibar,
Ben & Jerry's (tennis arm?), Pat Benetar
Riding on my handlebars, that I gathered from the scrap metal yard.
When it fell apart I got a rental car
with Meadowlark Lemon's credit card
double parked on the boulevard.
in front of cinnabon
Won a tug-of-war with a menotaur,
Then I toured the far north, with a portuguese Man-o-war.
Santa Claus handed me a catalogue,
the envelope attached on it said that you can have it all,
so I got an antelope from Manitoba, salad bowl, catapult, a can of soda, paddle boat, a camera phone..
And also a Barry Manalo, on a (graphed?) cantalope,
and every episode of Solid Gold the antidote to baylon,
And an Amazon in an acid-washed camisole, and her friend to tag along,
Who looked at all (Napalonean??)....
When I do that damn thing, I do that damn thing, I do that damn thing I do that there.... (now, that sounds like "damn thing" but it could just as well be "there thing" the whole way through...eh, whatever)
That's most of the first verse...any help with the question mark words? I really have no idea for a few of them :p
Here's a story folks, totally stoned,
I rolled the slopes around (Holy Oak?) at 40-below,
Low and behold my homey poked too many holes in my snow-mobile wheels,
now I'm rolling on some Bobollis with spokes.
Had to pony up the dough to get an all green and gold mobile home,
Stolen oreo, a polaroid, some saltines, and overcoat from Walgreens, some courdaroys, some sardines,
canola oil, all singing row row row your boat.
On and on with only one kinobi shinobi and Kobe Bryant,
Pokemon and pinnochio on the (oki-finoki?) swamp
( [here in portugal?] to tokyo?), borneo and coney island,
with a horny toad, memorial orchestra with Barry White,
Lyrics Born will rhyme (small refocus?...there's more here I have no idea WTF it is??)
...an accordian and Joe Torrey on chops,
Don Corleon on accordian, tomorrow morning, when we record,
Jerome (and malta?) singing owee owee oh.
when I do that damn thing, I do that damn thing I do that damn, thing I do that there........
WHOA...Einstein do it!
wikki, wikki, etc.
WHOA!! bring it back now....
I met a hermit named Kermit McDermott/
With a learners permit/
Curb surfin' in a purple suburban/
Slurpin' an urban sherbert/
Eatin' a turnip/
With the words dirty-dirty/
Written in cursive on his burberry turban/
It was curtains at the circus in Berkley,
saw a turtle with a girdle, a squirrel with a curl,
the worlds biggest (girl?) Earl, Erkel swirled in a circle,
on a dirty-ass burgundy Murray bike,
I had some curried rice, turkey burger and some curly fries,
tried to return some (urbans?) merchandise to Circuit City,
Customer service was certified but shitty,
courtesy clerk was nervous, kinda' twitchy,
had a triangle perm, reminded me of Lionel Ritchie,
someone blurted out "BURRR", and when I turned around, observed,
truck turner had the burner out, and pointed at a surfer,
Mr. Philly burst out the beauty (parlor?) and curlers,
and a security jersey, thermos full of Wild Turkey
When I do that damn thing, I do that damn thing, I do that damn thing, I do that there.
And this is what I do instead of English homework on a Sunday morning :p
