This isn’t exactly a log entry, but I wanted to write about this because it has been on my mind and heart a lot since last weekend (see above entries if you don’t know what I’m talking about), and then I saw the comments after
this article. If you’re reading this log (and I realize I only reach a very small number of people), I just wanted to encourage you to keep going, no matter what people say or do to discourage you. If I reach even one person it’s worth it, and it’s MY log, dammit, so I’ll write what I want.
First off, don’t worry about your weight. Weight is just a number on a scale. I’m not saying to completely disregard it; if you suddenly start gaining or losing 20 pounds in the course of a few weeks, you should definitely be concerned, but it’s not the only (or even the best) measuring stick you should use. Don’t worry about what other people say your weight should be. Don’t worry about looking like this model or that actor; you cannot look exactly like any other person, or have their abs, or their shoulders, or whatever. Your genetics are different, and even if they weren’t, even if you were their identical twin, you would STILL have differences. What you CAN do is look like the best possible version of yourself.
The number of pounds you weigh tells you almost nothing about yourself. Since I started learning parkour in July, I’ve gone from a size 12 to a size 8 (actually, it should probably be a size 6 at this point, but I don’t have the money to replace that much of my wardrobe yet again), so there have obviously been some changes going on in the way I look. Want to know how much weight I’ve lost during that time? Between 5 and 7 pounds, total. Muscle weighs more than fat, and if you start training seriously, you’re going to be building some muscle. It’s entirely possible for you to lose fat (and inches), but still see numbers on the scale going up or staying the same.
It’s also possible to have very different body composition while maintaining the very same weight, so what you should worry about is the composition – the percent fat compared to the percent muscle – of your body. And even those numbers will vary from person to person, even among healthy individuals. Weight certainly doesn’t dictate who you are as a person, and if you’re happy with a higher percentage of fat than normal, or a higher percentage of muscle, kudos to you! Keep it, if it makes you happy. Don’t change your body to make anyone else happy; change it to make yourself happy. You, and you alone, have the power to do that.
I’ve had two different boyfriends (note the past tense here) who tried to get me to start working out so that I could conform to THEIR ideas of beauty. I dug in my heels and flat-out refused, because pleasing another person with the shape of my body, which belongs to ME, is not on my agenda. Like me for who I am, as I am now, or don't bother. Now that I’m doing something for myself, something that I love, I’m seeing changes and I’m liking them. I’ve worked hard for them, and I’m proud of myself. I know it’s not socially acceptable to say this, but I’m happy with the way I look. I like me. Changing the way you look for another person is never worth it, and it rarely sticks. Changing the way you treat your body, and yourself, is something that is ultimately up to you, and something that you should only do for yourself. I think it’s worth it in the long run; you have to make that decision on your own.
One last thing, and then I’m done. Women can do anything they want to do. Ladies, don’t put yourself down because you’re a woman in this sport (or any other), and don’t let anyone else do it either. Women are just as capable of doing parkour as men are. Just look at all the women in that video if you need evidence – or inspiration. It’s true that men on average start of with a higher base strength (and by “base” here, I mean the starting amount in an untrained individual), but women on average start off with better flexibility. We can learn balance skills more quickly, and we gain strength at the same rate as men, percentage-wise. Our muscle fibers are identical in every way at the cellular level. Plus (added bonus), after training, our recovery times are faster on average than men’s recovery times.
Our advantage lies in finding our strengths and exploiting them, and finding our weaknesses and working to mitigate them. Who do you think will get better faster: a person who trains regularly and diligently, or someone who doesn’t try and doesn’t care? Work hard, and you’ll see results. That’s not going to change just because of your gender. In the end, you’re only competing with yourself.
We’re not any better – or any worse – than men at training parkour. Just different. And we can do this.
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